The Kink Boom - where it comes from

Kink culture is more visible, louder, and more fashionable than ever before. Once hidden in dark basements, today it's a fashion style, a sexual alternative, and a hot add-on for everyone. What's behind this trend, which has really taken off since 2020 – is it a real sexual revolution, or are we just more keen on wearing latex and collars now? What remained from Corona...

Welcome to the late modern era of desire

When we talk about "Kink" today, many mean more than just BDSM. "Kink" is an umbrella term that encompasses everything beyond normative sexuality: role-playing, polyamory, fetish fashion, power dynamics, ass-slapping. There are also a number of new fetish party formats that are more reminiscent of swingers' clubs, but so be it – to each their own, all good. Celebrate yourselves!

The kink boom phenomenon is observable to everyone. While the aesthetic has exploded in pop culture, I wondered if anything has really changed in private bedrooms? Is the bed now more like the kitchen table? The data is scarce; there are practically no serious studies yet that have fundamentally investigated what's going on or not. But there are well-founded, plausible assumptions from sociology and psychology.

Pandemic Phenomenon – Control, Loss of Control, and Lust

To understand the boom, we need to look back at the Corona era. The pandemic turned our world upside down: lockdowns, contact restrictions, working from home, constant fear of illness and death. Many people lost the feeling of control over their lives. And in some cases, it was indeed true – we were practically disempowered for weeks. (Whether that was justified and lawful, I will not comment on here.) In such times of crisis, we look for ways to deal with stress. This is precisely where the essence of kinks – of BDSM – was helpful.

If you experience – or rather, suffer – an almost complete loss of control over your life in everyday situations, consensually negotiating a role-play or a session in private can paradoxically give you a feeling of autonomy and security back. Because YOU set the rules now. YOU know what's happening – unlike the completely unpredictable world out there. The game with the flogger, with top and bottom, then serves especially to find emotional depth and intensity in a particular time and – lustful (self-)control.

So kink can be a healthy mechanism to confront fear. Psychology attributes the power of a coping strategy ("coping effect") to this exciting activity. Apparently, this made many people curious and eager to experiment during the pandemic. Boredom might also have played a role, once Netflix was exhausted, and the dynamics of cabin fever certainly did, of course. A psychological reversal, turning suffering into pleasure!

Power of Aesthetics - from Code to Pop to Opportunity

Historically, the LLL-look (latex, leather, lacquer) has its roots in subversive subcultures. Already in the 1970s, designers like Vivienne Westwood combined fetish clothing from the sadomasochistic scene with punk style to create a deliberately rebellious image. The clothing was meant to be a disturbing protest, to radically set oneself apart from the "normal world."

In 1990, Jean Paul Gaultier, with Madonna's pointy cone bra, propagated that kinky sexuality, art, and pop belong together. From 2011, Fifty Shades of Grey made BDSM a global topic of conversation. What used to provoke was defused, domesticated, romanticized. "I'd never beat you black and blue. I aim for pink.", says Christian Grey. General society accepts "such things" as long as they are nicely packaged.

When H&M sells leather harnesses and Adidas, together with Beyoncé, launches a latex dress, the code initially loses its promise. The fashion industry commercializes the aesthetic and makes it suitable for the masses. You can wear the style, signal transgressions, and feel part of the community without having to engage deeply with, or even live through, the complex ethical and psychological foundations of real practices. But: For many young people, this offers a broad ramp for finding their identity. They use it as an entry point ("gateway strategy") to signal belonging without having to immediately adopt an entire life philosophy. I actually think this is a very good side effect.

Maybe we really have become more relaxed

Society today speaks more openly about non-normative sexuality, which in itself is an enormous step towards greater sexual freedom, or at least could be. We at KinkShirt.com want to promote this social dialogue through our designs. However, as open, tolerant people, we must learn to distinguish between deep, lived liberation and superficial, fashionable masquerade – and to accept that both exist side by side, that both are perfectly fine.

No Dictate – "Anything goes, anything is right"

We live in a culture of performance. Everything is shown, shared, evaluated – especially sexuality. The kink look is cool, seems confident, and whoever doesn't participate might quickly appear boring in their circles. This creates a subtle pressure, namely the compulsion to be sexy, open, and confident. Intimacy lost! Philosopher Michel Foucault would have dryly commented: "Society controls itself through the obligation to openness."

Kink - BDSM - loses its depth for me when it becomes a uniform. True liberation, for me, is not a lifestyle; it's a process. Kink is not a yes or no, but a continuum between surrender and self-determination, between play and meaning. For some, it's pleasure; for others, therapy. For still others, it's simply an aesthetic statement. Live and let live – all of it is right. But everyone should define for themselves what it is individually, as this facilitates communication.

KinkShirt.com is right in the middle. We extend the hot weekend into everyday life, if you will, but encrypted. Our clothes are extremely communicative. To have a dialogue, you should have something relevant to say. That's why there's this blog, which will feed you with relevant thoughts in many ways. See it as empowerment!

Kinky regards!

Thymos Emm

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(* "We don't try to shock anyone – that only creates distance. We want intimacy." Journalist, author 'The Dominus Effect', kinkster, scene-goer. Committed to the kinky world of Munich and beyond. Loving sadist: 'Come on, give me a smile!')